>Space Baby

>

Our weekend was rather eventful, minus having a baby. On Saturday night we got word from our good friends in a band that they got us on the guest list so come on down! They did not go on until 11pm so we hung out at home, I worked on the project I mentioned in my previous post, took a bath and actually put some make up on. The show was at a small venue down town with great acoustics and lighting. The drinks specials are always good. B got rum and coke for $3 and I had coke for just $1 with free refills. Side note: I started to feel really light headed and needed the sugar boost. But I feel the same way today so, mommies out there, is this a sign of labor to come?? Anyway, we found some other friends there and visited with them and soon enough The Northern Way hit the stage. I LOVE local music and I LOVE this band even more. Long story short: I have been a fan of this band for nearly 5 years now. I have seen them change members and even their name and now they are the perfect mesh if musical styles, lyrics, and personalities. Our friends are the drummer (my ex) and the lead singer (B's friend from high school whom we had in common BEFORE ever meeting or dating). The show was great and I had some nice strong contractions that lead to, well, nothing. We got home late and went to bed. I was up too early. My body clock just wakes me up at 8 no matter what time I go to bed the night before so I made waffles and ate breakfast in bed. We watched the Aussie Open and played with he dogs. Then I got this crazy idea that B should paint on my belly before my belly is no more. He is a GREAT artist and knew he would do an awesome job so he got his acrylics out and set up shop next to our bed. In an hours time, we had this:

SPACE BABY!!

Once I got up and moved around, the paint really started to irritate my skin. I was trying so hard not to itch it. Then I started to feel light headed again and nearly passed out in the pantry. I ate some lunch, watched some XGames and took a long nap. Now B and I are hanging out on the couch not doing much other than waiting. We are having a February baby people! I am actually happy about that as I am not the biggest fan of odd numbers. Weird, I know.

>How Blogging Has Changed my Life

>

First of all, thank you Tabitha for a GREAT writing prompt! It is only a nice little kicker that this gets me an entry in your giveaway, but reflecting on this NOW could not be more perfect timing.

I have been blogging now for a little over a year and a half. Prior to that, I did not do any other form of journaling. I started my blog for a few reasons:

1) I wanted to keep track of our early married years, years which I was sure to forget as time went on and everyone knows the first year of marriage is VERY exciting.

2) I had a horrible experience on craigslist and stumbled upon a blog that noted the exact same experience, same names and everything. That was a sign.

3) I am a writer. I love writing and what better way to do it than through a blog, something that is casual and not concerned with perfect grammar or grades.

All this to say that blogging has become a huge outlet for me to keep track of our life events, big or small, and look back at them with deep nostalgia. How is it changing me? Now that we are expecting our first child, I have even more reasons to write about the pregnancy and soon (VERY SOON!!) our new son. I enjoy sharing these thoughts with a select few of you and won't lie that the comments make me melt a little too. So a few weeks ago I was hanging out with our new activities director at work and she mentioned an art project she was going to get the residents interested in and this is what it was:

Take an old book, one which you are no longer reading/enjoying and turn it into a collage of your life. This had my head spinning! I immediately found a book to use and knew exactly what I was going to do. I wanted to take all of my posts on here pregnancy related and put they into this book. A true expression of my first pregnancy in my own words. Yesterday I started to cut out words and pictures from parenting magazines and last night I was copy and pasting my entries into a Pages document. (This project has kept me preoccupied enough to not think so much about WHEN baby boy will be here).

The point?? Had I not started this blog and kept up on it so well, I would not have those entires to use and place into this creative journal I am putting into something tangible. I am not necessarily doing it for my child. I would not expect Logan to be interested in all the things that I was going through while pregnant with him, but maybe there are a few he will enjoy someday. I am doing this for me. I know that once we have more than one child, I will not be able to do this with every baby. My time will be with them. Becoming pregnant and becoming a mother has been my biggest dream come true and I NEED it to be something I can look back on. I fear sometimes that one day, the internet might just disappear and all these entries and words and emotions will be gone. Blogging has changed my life in that I am a better writer, I have a way to express how I am feeling at any given time, and I have memories of the smallest and biggest moments of our married life to date and that is priceless.

>NO Baby Yet

>

You bloggies are so anxious I love it! It just makes me feel better that I am not the only one sitting around thinking "When the HELL is this going to happen?!"

So no baby yet. But, I am having some signs of early labor, or I am just making them up in my head. Either way I will keep you posted so no worries. For now, nothing hurts and as far as I can tell, no contractions. So once the pain and contrax kick in well then I will know for sure.

I think it is also worth mentioning (maybe for the second time??) that B and his brother were both born on a full moon and well that, ladies, is TOMORROW!!! So hoping for this weekend!!

Love and hugs,

S.

(Ps. I am not as depressed today as I was the other day during my vent. B took me out to Applebees last night with some friends and it cheered me right up.)

>I've just got to pout about it...

>

Why is everyone ELSE having their babies and NOT ME?!

Oh no, don't get me wrong here. I am SO happy for those who have welcomed their little and that they are healthy and doing well!

I just want it to be MY TURN!!

Com'n baby! Bust my bag of waters! Bring on the contractions! Make me wish I wasn't writing this silly post so I can hold and kiss your sweet cheeks! K?

I just love you so much, baby boy. Mama wants to meet you! Along with the rest of our family and friends!

::twiddling thumbs::

>39 weeks!!!!

>

How Far Along? 39 weeks
Total Weight Gained/Loss? 40ish
Maternity Clothes: I rarely wear pants anymore when I am at home. I don't think B minds much... ;) And I sleep in his T shirts now.
Sleep? the last few nights have been okay. had some strong contractions as I was drifting off last night and was able to fall asleep so obviously not anything to write home about
Best Moment of the Week? my last day of work was on Saturday! So glad to be home resting and waiting now.
Movement- lately he swivels back and forth to get his feet in my ribs. Oh and he gets hiccups at least 2-3 times a day.
Food Craving- still craving harvest squash raviolis. B promised that if our babe was not here by next Monday then he will take me out to have them. They are expensive so yeah, I have to wait. Grrr
Food aversions- none
Morning sickness?- you know, I have been nauseous on and off several mornings over the past week. not sure what that is all about...
Gender- Wolverine
Labor Signs- Stronger contractions. I thought I would for sure have a baby this weekend with Friday's stint of constant contractions but then nothing on Saturday. Puhy.
Belly Button- out
What I miss- my body. ready to get it back.
What I'm looking forward to-going into labor!! DUH!
Weekly Wisdom- B said that if I keep hoping for it to happen then it's like I am waiting to fall asleep and I can't because I keep thinking about wanting to fall asleep and it keeps me awake. Ok B.
Milestones- 7 days until our DD!

No pic this week due to the camera being packed already. I don't even want to risk forgetting it. I am trying to let my mind relax about thinking constantly when is this going to happen. How weird is it that I am PRAYING FOR PAIN?! This fact just dawned on me last night. Not very sane. K, back to waiting and walking.

>Future Goals

>

I am writing this down before I forget, before a baby boy occupies my mind and my time that I neglect to write down some future goals I must remember and stay focused on.

For whatever reason, over the last few weeks I have really been reflecting on my life and more specifically, what I am going to do with it. My biggest dream come true is about to happen. I am becoming a mother. I have never wanted or thought of something more for the better part of my life. When I was a child, my mother ran a home day care. I have several younger cousins and started to babysit when I was 12. Taking care of children, nurturing their little minds and kissing tears away is something I have been doing for years. I prayed that I would someday be a mother with a man who is more of my best friend than a husband. I love him to death and bring a child into the world with him is that giant cherry on top. I seriously could not be happier.

Through most of college and even post college I have thought about becoming a teacher. But why? Why would I be good at teaching? Well, I am great with kids. That's and easy one. I love reading and writing and believe kids need someone patient enough to teach them how to do it properly. Oh but then there's that: patience. I am so not a patient person. I mean, I can be, but I am a let's-get-the-show-on-the-road kinda girl. For other reasons, I just did not get my teaching license before graduating and it makes me wonder why. Then last spring when I was thinking, okay I am ready to do this, I applied for school again, was accepted and just waiting on my acceptance into the teaching program when we found out about our mister. I believe everything happens for a reason and God had something else in mind for us. So my point is that as I have made small attempts to get my teaching license, there have been obstacles that have come about and it makes me wonder why. In my reflections, I have determined that hey, maybe I am not meant to be a teacher. I don't really think it is what I want to do as a career for the rest of my life. I feel guilty about this, because I think a huge part of my pursuit of the certification was for my parents, to please them and make them happy. This may have just been something almost subconscious that I have been thinking and now that I am confronting it, that is a terrible reason to get into a certain career. If I am going to do that, it is going to be for me, because I want to and honestly, I don't want to teach.

So I am becoming a mother, now what? I will have to go back to work, even if it is just part time, once my leave is over. I am totally okay with that but I am not going to be a receptionist forever. I need something WAY more stimulating and fun in my life. I know a child will be perfect for that, but financially I will have to work. At least for now. Now the question is, what do I want to do, aside from being a mom? I know I will want something more because that is just my personality. This is what I have been mulling over for several weeks now.

My new favorite show on TV is House Hunters. Recently, a young couple bought a beautiful place in Costa Rica to open a bed and breakfast. So inspiring! I have thought of opening a bed and breakfast for YEARS, but never really thought it was something that could be done. Yes, me of little faith. Well their story has inspired me so much that I can't even stop thinking about the idea. This is something we would be doing, hopefully, over the next 5 years or so. But I am VERY serious about this now. On thing I have always wanted, which I am sure everyone wants, is to not have to answer to someone. I hate feeling like I have made a mistake and being a disappointment. In guest services, this is something that happens often and is not what I am talking about. I am talking about a boss, someone who works above you telling you what you can and cannot do. I want to be my own boss.

Here is my five year plan:

1) Become a mother (check!)

2) Own our own home.

3) Find the perfect place for a bed and breakfast in our area and purchase it.

4) Begin necessary steps to open bed and breakfast.

5) Build our home on the same land as the bed and breakfast (this is on the 8 year plan).

6) Be my own boss!!

I love it! I have always thought about opening some kind of family business and I really believe this is it. I know that there are a million things that will happen between now and then, but knowing what I want to do is such a relief. I feel great!

Now, onto giving birth....

>The End is Near

>

The last few days have been quite the rollercoaster. Cramping started Thursday night and was mild enough that I actually slept pretty well and when I woke up Friday morning, I did not notice them. Well shortly after arriving at work, I started to have some more cramping. Again, nothing really painful, just uncomfortable. I had asked my OB about what I thought were gas cramps and if they could cause contractions. He said that if I was not running to the bathroom following the cramps, that yes, they were most likely contractions and at this point that was a good thing. So I was giddy Friday, thinking that the was near! Sometime in the morning, the BH contractions really started to get intense. Nothing super painful, but I could time them anywhere from 10-40 minutes apart and sometimes, they took my breath away by how tight my tummy would become. I started to get anxious and called B several times. He reminded me that it could be early labor and to just drink water and try to relax. So I finished out my work day, came home and laid down, drank a ton of water and within a few hours the contractions subsided and as far as I can tell, nothing happend today. I am really trying not to get my hopes up here but it is so hard not to!! I am SO excited that we will finally be meeting Logan in what is literally DAYS!! So B and I have attempted some old wives tales to try and get labor going. So far nothing but I am hoping that on Tuesday at our appointment we will hear the words "yes, S, YOU ARE DILATING!!". :)

>Meltdown Accomplished

>

After I put up my post, I felt a little better. I had not even cried yet and was feeling that just writing about how I felt was the therapy I had been looking for. Thank you to those of you who commented and told me I am not crazy. You're sweet. But I am sure you felt crazy at this point too.

So I was hanging out, watching TV, Bumping...and B called. He wanted to go over to a buddy's house and I asked that he come home because I had barely seen him all day and he was fine with that. I was in a pretty good mood and when he came in the door I greeted him with a hug and kiss. We sat back down and he mentioned that said buddy invited him to come over on Friday night. This is fine. I know the guy. But here is the problem, and what I am writing is written in confidence. If you know me IRL, then lets keep this between us, k?

When I met B nearly three years ago, I quickly learned he enjoyed smoking pot. I have never been tolerant of this leisurely, illegal activity and did not hold back in communicating that to B. In the those three years, this topic has really been the only source of our biggest fights, ones that I can count on one hand. We never fight. So over those years, he has really cut back and I am more tolerant of him smoking every once in awhile. I even tried it on our honeymoon. Meh, I can think of better things to do. Anyway, so he might smoke once a month or so, which is nothing and I am truly okay with that. Where the problem comes in is that knowing this buddy of B's, I knew he would be smoking with him. Fine, if I was not a week and a half away from my due date. I don't want B to be inebriated in any way, shape or form when labor kicks in. He even drank the last beer in the fridge last night so that when that time comes and we are ready to head to the hospital, we won't have to worry about that.
Well, I brought that up shortly after B mentioned visiting him on Friday. I asked that if he goes over there, that he refrains from smoking "just in case". He said, "oh yeah, I had not thought of that" and then 5 seconds later, "so I can't have even a hit or two?" And I fell apart. He understood what I was asking, and then tried to get around it. He was contradicting what he was saying and even got upset with me for "telling" him what he can and cannot do. I was not saying that at all. I even told him that if we were not so close to a baby arriving, I would have been fine with it. I would not have even brought the subject up.
So I started crying. And I couldn't stop. We made up and the subject was not even an issue anymore, but I couln't stop. I started thinking about all my aches and pains, how tired I am, how I have no idea what to do with a new baby....it was an avelanche. B just watched me crumble. The more I talked about the things on my mind, the more I cried. I have mentioned before that anxiety is an angry monster I have delt with for several years now that has reared it's ugly head on and off throughout the pregnancy. Well, he's back and now I have irrational fears about bad things happening. So I talked to B about those feelings and sometime around midnight I stopped blubbering. B held me, played with my hair (my fave!) and told me everything would be perfect and that I need to just pray and trust. So I prayed for peace and asked for strenght to trust. Two things I am not very good at welcoming. It is so hard, yet so important.

So I had my meltdown and I am SO tired today. All that crying has left my eyes burning. I slept so horribly. Worst night of sleep yet. The highlight was seeing my friend for lunch today. Again, being social is not a common occurance for me so it was nice to get out for a few hours. B is trying to fix our glider that keeps breaking at the base. I am ready to throw it out the window but he is determined to get it right this time. He is also picking up new shelves for our blue armoir in the nursery which I plan to paint over the weekend. But I am hoping labor starts soon so if I don't get to the painting, I can do it later.

>Mommy Meltdown

>

I am sure there is a future post with this same time once Logan arrives, but it needs to be said now. I am ready to explode. What I mean by that is cry and cry my eyes out! It is so hard to appreciate anything other than knowing I am still healthy and so is the baby and my husband loves me despite my naggy and needy attitude. I mean really, I actually feel bad for the way I feel, but it has to be said that I am not a happy camper right now.

1) So Logan has been head down and low for nearly 10 weeks now. But not until the last few days has he felt so heavy that my right leg falls asleep as I walk and the pressure in my groin and hips is almost unbearable. I am so thankful that I sit for most of my day otherwise I would have stopped working last week. Getting up from a laying or sitting position feels like I am holding a forty pound box and lifting it without any leverage. OMG the pressure.

2) I have had a perpetual headache for almost a week now. It comes and goes, but shows up daily. I was thinking it was due to how freaking dry it has been here lately so I tried using some saline spray to moisten things up and even that did not prevent the headaches OR the bloody noses I keep having. I was 10 minutes late to work due to one of those the other morning and the person I was relieving was none to happy.

3) Exhausted, tired BEYOND belief. I don't even know how I am making it through a work day. I came home from lunch and nearly passed out on B. Easy to do when he's playing with my hair. I love him. But really, I am so tired it does not help my needy and crankyness.

4) My ribs feel like they are splitting in two. Every time I eat and they stretch out I cringe in pain. Nuff said.

I think I am writing this to a) vent and b) have a friendly reminder of what pregnancy was like when I get the itch 9 months from now to have another baby. Um no. Not gonna happen. In case anyone is wondering, we will not be having more children until we own a home which could be 2-4 years from now. One baby in apartment living is quite enough.

B is not home so I am taking my discomfort to the internet. K, done wallowing now.

>38 Weeks

>

Wow I look so tired in this picture! Must be because I am. I am also not wearing any makeup and I let my hair air dry this morning so I really have not done much in the way of upping my looks. And I don't care.

I feel huge. But when others comment on my size, they are so sweet and tell me I

look great, that I don't look 9 months pregnant, blah blah blah. Very kind words. It makes me smile. We had a great OB appointment today. STILL no dilation. We have stayed the same with 80% effacement and +1 head station. Here is a visual for those of you wondering what the station means. According to my dear friend who happens to also be a doula, effacement and station can be the hardest things for a first time mom to accomplish in labor and I am also done with that part so lets home my labor is quick and easy!

(googled for this pic)

So the station is where the baby's head is located in the pelvis. Now you can see why I feel huge. This child of mine is spreading my legs apart! I can't cross my legs or sit normal on the floor. These are all good things in the way of wanting labor to being soon!

I also found out I have LOST 2 pounds. I would be lying if I said I was not happy about that. The nurse explained that is common near the end due to baby taking more and more from me and me not having huge appetites anymore since there is so little room in my stomach. This is all true. I do eat less and less frequently. However, when I am hungry, I do eat quite a bit which just means I finish my meals. Something I was not that great at doing pre-pregnancy.

We had a great conversation with our OB about what his thoughts are on induction. I was worried that if I went even just a few days past my due date that they might try to induce for no good reason and he set my fears aside and said that without there being a true medical reason/complication to induce, they will let me go 42 weeks. K now, I really don't want to go that long. But you never know. Even though this child has been teasing us for weeks that he wants to come early, it could be just that: a tease. So I wanted to make sure we were all on the same page.

This coming week is my last week at work and I am already feeling bitter-sweet about it. I know that might sound weird, but I truly love where I work and who I work with. Once Logan comes I am sure it will be very hard for me to go back, but I will have to. Unless we win the lottery. So this week, while I am sure it will drag on at times, will be a special week in that I won't see our residents for several more months. I plan on making cookies on Thursday to share with everyone on Friday. My last day is Saturday. I am very excited to be done, because that means mister is coming so don't get me wrong. And physically, I am SO TIRED! I want to nap when I come home on my lunch break but it just isn't long enough. I am sleeping okay still, but have been having some hot flashes and I wake up to pee and roll over and it just is not great sleep. I don't know when I will have great sleep again. ;)

Stats:

How Far Along? 38 weeks
Total Weight Gained/Loss? 40 pounds, lost 2 this week
Maternity Clothes: my pants are getting VERY TIGHT and are really not that comfortable. even my sweats.
Sleep? like I said above, okay but not great
Best Moment of the Week? having a great ob appointment today
Movement- longer periods of sleep and wakefulness. when he is awake he groves and i love it
Food Craving- breakfast and strawberries, today all I want is harvest squash raviolies
Food aversions- none
Morning sickness?- none
Gender- Wolverine
Labor Signs- stronger BH and more often
Belly Button- out
What I miss- wearing my wedding ring (i still miss this)
What I'm looking forward to-my water breaking, which I know it might not on it's own, but I can hope
Weekly Wisdom- "progress" does not mean much when you are pregnant until you actually go into labor
Milestones- 14 days left!

>Bible in a Year

>

Has anyone else ever read the Bible in a year? It is something I have wanted to do for a very long time and I am not quite sure where to begin. I have found different suggestions online, but if any of you have some guidance on where to start, how much to read each day, and where to go next that would be great!

Thanks!

>A Day in the Life..

>I am not quite sure as to why I have been so motivated to write this kind of post, but I feel like if I don't I will wish I had. Since my memory is not very dependable these days, I have resorted to my blog to document the things I feel are worth documenting.

Things I used to hate before I was pregnant:

*Steak: I could eat steak almost every night and the way B prepares it is divine. Tip? Use sea salt to salt the meat with other seasonings instead of regular salt.

*Not wearing socks to bed: Aside from VERY hot summer days, I rarely ever went to bed without socks on. This used to bug bestie when we were roomies as she could not even fathom the thought of wearing socks to bed, even in the dead of winter. Well I am here to say that I now rarely ever wear socks to bed and I looooovve the way that feels.

*Showering/hot showers: I have never liked showering mostly because it just takes up so much time and I am NOT a high maintenance person when it comes to beauty. Yes, I would get clean and I liked that feeling, but I could never understand why B would just stand in the shower for 10 minutes because "it feels good". Now I totally understand and not only do I really enjoy my showers, I take super hot showers. I think this also became something I liked when I noticed how much Mister loves when I am in the water. He groves like he is a little fish and I hope he loves baths that much when he gets here.

*A Lack of Manners: I've got to be honest here. I cuss like a sailor and burp and fart like a college guy. Yes, folks, this drives B crazy to no end and at times, even me. If I hold anything in, I am literally in physical pain. B does not want me to be in pain. The only problem is, which I have mentioned before, that never in my life have my farts been so rank I get up and leave! It is unbelievable and I really hope that gets better post baby.

Those things are the most obvious to me that have changed and I am pretty sure most of those will stay the same, minus the manners. I want to get those back.

Next, here is a day in the life. What we do while we wait for a baby as I am sure many of these things will change VERY soon.

Work day:

6am: alarm goes off

6:15am: out of bed, get dressed, do hair and make-up, brush teeth

6:30am: (I told you I was low maintenance) Eat breakfast, feed dogs, check FB

6:50am: Leave for work

7am: Get to work

12pm: Go home for lunch, which B usually makes me, put feet up and watch A Baby Story

1pm: Back to work

3:15pm: Home from work

3:30-6ish: Watch Gilmore Girls, play around on the net, write a blog, create a music playlist, relax on the couch

6ish: Dinner (usually made by B or ordered in)

7ish-10pm: Relax, crochet, read, watch shows...

10pm: Go to bed

Non-work day:

8-9am: Sleep in, make breakfast, start a load of laundry

9am-whenever: Rest, nap, read, crochet, nap, watch a movie, play video games with B, nap, finish laundry, EAT....

Basically, I don't do a whole lot when I am at home and I like that as I am usually sore, tired and hungry and the thought of doing much else is not very appetizing. So I know this will all change and maybe sometime after mister comes I will do something similar and see how different things are. I currently feel like I am in limbo, waiting for the most life-changing thing to occur while I am still living and doing my daily routines. It's surreal and awesome and totally making me impatient. I sat in front of the TV tonight and squatted and while I squatted I swayed, hoping to open things up and get things moving some more. Send me labor dust people!

>37 Weeks!

>

Compare to:

Wowza! This baby is a growing!! Amazing what can happen in 9 short months. I am getting SO impatient it is not even funny! I am sure I am driving B nuts with all my "He's almost here!" comments. I know he is just as excited as I am. I feel done. This turkey has cooked long enough folks and I am ready to meet my son, get my body back, and actually do something for myself. B has been so wonderful, helping me out with almost everything and I feel SO GUILTY! I want to step in but oh that step causes a shooting pain down my leg, my ribs hurt my hips are sore, and I am too hungry for words most of the time. So I will just have to wait a few more weeks (including a few post baby weeks to recover). We went for a 45 minute walk this afternoon and brought on some strong BH contractions. I had 3 in 30 minutes but now that we are home they stopped. :( I had an OB appointment today and it was the easiest, quickest appointment ever! We came in, my BP was 106/54, I have stayed at about 42 pounds (yay! a week I did NOT gain a pound!), HB was 145 and all is well! The nurse started to pull out the paper cover and I said I was not getting checked this week. My vadge needs a break people! She said that was fine but that they would next week and I am okay with that. I want to try and walk every day, as long as it is warm enough, to get things moving more!

Stats:

How Far Along? 37 weeks
Total Weight Gained/Loss? 42 pounds and holding
Maternity Clothes: all the time
Sleep? I wake up every time I roll over and pee maybe once or twice a night. My hips hurt after laying on one side to long.
Best Moment of the Week? Seeing my grandma and other family members yesterday.
Movement- still quite a bit even though he is getting squished in there
Food Craving- breakfast and strawberries
Food aversions- none
Morning sickness?- none
Gender- Wolverine
Labor Signs- stronger BH today, not painful, just tighter
Belly Button- out
What I miss- wearing my wedding ring
What I'm looking forward to-duh! meeting this little man!
Weekly Wisdom- Patience is a virtue. Or so I've been told.
Milestones- 3 more weeks!

>Name reveal...I just can't wait!

>

First of all, I am losing followers. I know my blog is now private and so I am guessing those I have lost are people that chose not to continue to follow and that is fine, it is just weird to watch the number shrink.

Secondly, I am SO DONE! OMG this week and last week have been the LONGEST weeks of my pregnancy to date. I CANNOT WAIT to meet our baby!!

Which brings me to numero tres: I can't wait to tell you his name because this blog is more for me than for you so you ready??? Also, I am not sure that once he is here I will be able to summarize how we chose his name so easily so enjoy!

Our Precious Son will be

Logan Jack

Don't you love how that sounds?!

So here is the story of how we chose his name, because yes, there is a story.

Two and a half years ago B and I took a trip to the midwest to see our families. His family has a lovely cottage on Lake Erie in Ohio and that was our last stop. We spent several days there,

hanging out at the beach...

getting rained out at Cedar Point...

taking ferry rides to Put in Island...

and riding tandem bikes.

On our last night we went to a nice Italian restaurant down the street from the cottage. We had several glasses of wine and decided to walk back to the cottage alone to reflect on our vacation that was coming to an end (or do as much reflecting as one can do while inebriated). It was dark and we did get a little lost so B (yes, MY HUSBAND!) out of no where asked me what I thought of the name Logan. At this point in our relationship (about 6 months in pre-engagement) we knew we were going to get married. That was a done deal. So I told him I really liked that name.

And he said, "Great, because I always wanted to name our son after Wolverine!" Oh dear. My husband wants to name our son after a comic book character. It's a good thing that I was well aware of B's interest (more like hobby) in comics, X-Man being one of his favorites.

I think I laughed after he said that and told him "Okay! Whatever...".

He then asked, "So we can call him Wolverine?"

"No, honey. I am not calling my son Wolverine."

"What about Weapon X?" (complete with arm signals displaying an X).

"No B, I am not calling my son Weapon X."

Needless to say, from that day forward we had a name picked out for our first son and even though I am sure B may refer to him as one of the aforementioned "nicknames", I am okay with that.

Logan's middle name was easy. B's grandfather passed away a year and a half ago and his name was Jack. B really looked up to him and it was the best way to remember him by. The two names together really sound great and even better with our last name, which is Irish, by the way.

So have you noticed in my status updates that where it asks the gender I have been putting "wolverine"?? I was trying to hint at his name but no one really caught on...oh well!

Have a great weekend!

>36 weeks

>

How Far Along? 36 weeks and a few days
Total Weight Gained/Loss? I said it in a previous post-a lot
Maternity Clothes: the things that fit me a month ago are barely fitting me now. I am down to about 3-4 shirts, sweats, work pants and jeans.
Sleep? I wake up every time I roll over and pee maybe once or twice a night. My hips hurt after laying on one side to long.
Best Moment of the Week? spending a wonderful day with B on Monday.
Movement- lots, but very specific: he will kick off the right side near my ribs, his butt will move to the left of my belly button and I will get a swift head butt into my cervix. rinse and repeat.
Food Craving- breakfast!
Food aversions- none
Morning sickness?- none
Gender- Wolverine
Labor Signs- some BH about every 2-3 hours. Nothing to worry about. 75% effaced and +1 station, no dilation
Belly Button- out and popped WAY out last night when I sneezed
What I miss- a nice glass of wine with dinner
What I'm looking forward to- having this baby!! We are only 3.5 weeks away from my EDD!
Weekly Wisdom- Don't let what people say convince you of anything. Everyone keeps telling me I am going to go early and well, that is a possibility but I could stay this way PAST my due date so I am ignoring people now.
Milestones- The feet are officially stuck up by my ribs, rather than just nudging them. THAT, my friends, feels SO GOOD! *NOT!*

>Shout out

>

Before I make my shout out, a quick update:

1) Hanson is on in my living room, it's snowing, B is on his way home from shoveling and Tulo is anxiously waiting for both him and Butte to come home.

2) Butte has been on vacation with my parents since Sunday and she won't be home until tomorrow.

3) Mister is really trying to just fall out right now. I worry about walking upright as I am sure he has a plan to do just that. While I'm working. And wearing something cute. And totally not expecting it. Cuz that's how he rolls.

4) Sleeping sucks. I pee too much. And BH have increased to a few every couple hours. I'm exhausted just writing about it.

Okay bloggie friends. I have another fellow bloggie friend who needs some lovin so I hope she does not mind that I am going to link up HERE for you to check her out. Thanks!

>Confession: I'm Ashamed

>

Dear Readers, please do not judge or hate on me for what I am about to say. I need to get this off my chest. K, thanks.

I would be lying if I said that my current weight does not bother me. I KNOW, I know it is natural and because I'm building a baby. I know. But in 9 short months I have managed to gain 42 pounds. I have no idea what my pant size would be since I am in maternity clothes and I think that is a good thing. I feel like the most shallow person to even be feeling this way but I really can't help it.

(December 13, 2009)

(August 8, 2008)
I can't help but dream about my pre-pregnancy body and wonder if I will ever get it back. I know it is possible but that is up to me. Nursing (assuming that works out) will defiantly help and I will have to wait a few weeks post birth before I can start any kind of work out routine. My dear cousin Heidi has created a great work out plan that is, so far, working out great for her so thanks H! I am totally stealing it from you. Ugh....I digress...

This sucks. I just hate feeling this way. My body image has NEVER been an issue for me. Ever. I have always been the tall, thin girl who has no athletic coordination to speak of, but a damn good metabolism that allowed me to eat just about anything I wanted. Before getting pregnant, I actually lost 5 pounds for Cabo and I felt great! During my first trimester, I never got morning sickness, but I also only gained 2 pounds. My doctor wanted to see me gain a little more as I was considered underweight so I drank a lot of milk, ate a lot of cheese, and upped my protein intake. I did not see a significant weight gain until I was almost 18 weeks pregnant and I was so proud! I wanted to gain a healthy weight for me and the baby. It became even more important when, at 29 weeks, we found out he was measuring a little small so I did not change anything in my diet. I have not had another growth scan, but I am pretty sure he weighs about 5-6 pounds now which is awesome!

I'm so torn for feeling the way I feel. I feel like I am being selfish. My weight should not bother me at all and B is so proud of me for growing a healthy baby and tells me I am "pregnant sexy" right now. But I want to me Sarah sexy!

This is a very sloppy vent and if anyone read it all, well thank you. Only a few more weeks! I know that the sacrifices are SO worth it and I could gain another 40 pounds I know it would not matter. All I want is a healthy baby and for me to make getting back to my prepreg weight a priority. I am sure there are things baby L would love to help me with: long walks, hanging out in the front pack while I climb the elliptical....we'll be a good team and I am sure all my feelings are both NORMAL and hormone-related. Until then, I will continue to eat healthy as I have been doing and TRY not to let the weight gain bother me.

>A Great End to a New Beginning

>

Cliche title, I know.

Our New Years Eve was wonderful! But before I go into it, here are some 35 week belly shots. Can you say HELLO BELLY BUTTON!

We started our day off by sleeping in. I have gone to 4 days a week and Thursdays are my new day off. We ran a few errands in the morning and then I took a two hour nap on the couch after watching a little bit of Free Willy. Oh man does that movie bring back childhood memories! Then we hung out for another few hours, I took a shower, got dressed and did my hair. I wanted to look extra hot for our big date! This was our date to end the year AND to celebrate our new baby. It will be awhile before we do that again so I spent a little extra time to look good.

We went to Hibachi's, a Japanese restaurant where the chefs cook the food right in front of you. SO FUN!! I had chicken teriyaki and B had chicken with rib eye steak. It was so good! I could not stop smiling.

After dinner we went home and watched 500 Days of Summer--super cute movie!! B even liked it so I would say it is not so much a chick flick but more of a romantic comedy even dudes can enjoy. The music is awesome. I might need to get the soundtrack off iTunes.

And then I went to bed! It was perfect!

Happy New Year everyone!!