the last two days {currently edition}

Blogging is falling to the wayside. Now I totally get it when my favorite mama bloggers stop blogging after having a baby. It's not that it is totally impossible, but it is exhausting to think about. I don't want to just blab. I want to have some kind of direction so that when I look back on this time it is well worth reading. Writing is hard. Putting all the thoughts in my head down here in a way that makes me want to come back reading it later is hard. And that is why I have not been writing much. I am just too damn tired. In fact, right now I am so tired I really just can't sleep and, well, it's only 739pm so I really should stay up til 9 after Evie's last night feeding (until the wee hours anyway).

I'm spending a lot more time pumping, and I really hate it. I would hate it even if I had to do it once a day. Now I have to do it three times and while it is more than worth it, I don't think I'm ever going to enjoy it. Nothing compares to the real deal.

I am saving a ton of breast milk. Like, I don't really know what to do with my stash. I cannot donate it, unfortunately, so I may be using some space in a deep freezer for awhile.

I am going to get the hang of this whole working-going to school-breastfeeding-pumping-wife-and-mama thing down one of these days. It's crazy busy but I love it.

I am sharing way too much, too often. I think that being away from work and school has be defaulting to facebook and instagram wayyyy too much. I get it. I know it. It's just hard to get away from now! It's like a disease. Somehow, I am going to back away from all that stuff. How weird to say. Anyway...

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And just like that, 12 weeks is gone. Evie is nearly 3 months old and I am back to work. What the what?! That's not even fair. Weird thing is, though, that I like working. And the anticipation of going back to work has been 1000x worse than actually going back. The last two days have been surprisingly good. I have to thank our amazing daycare provider for taking care of both my kids. I seriously have no worries or concerns when they are in her care. So far Evie has been a gem (duh!) and Logan and the other kids are just in love with her (double duh!). Those things make me happy and make going back to work easier. What's not easy is pumping three times a day, washing the parts, and trying to somehow fit in snacks and lunch without taking too much time away. Right now I am training on a new system so I have a little extra flexibility this week, but come next week I literally have 20 minutes to get to the nursing mothers room, set up, pump, tear down, clean up, rinse parts and be back. WHEW is all I have to say. And I'm out. Heading to bed. Thank you to the three or four of you who still stop by to check in on me and the fam.

What's a post without photos?!